ARGHH... MID-LIFE CRISIS

I am here. Now. at the present.

I used to be there. Back then. In the past.

I can be tough, I can be tender and sweet, cruel and mean. I can laugh. I can cry. I can be forgiving. I can be harsh. I can be anything and everything I want. But only when I am alone.

If only life is rewind-able and fastforward-able I'd hit the rewind button to the happier times and replay my life as often as I cared to.

The saddest thing is, once things pass you by, it's gone. You can try and make it happen again but it wont be the same. It wont feel the same. The memory is like a magnifying glass. It focuses things, it distorts things, making them seems more beautiful, making them dull.

For someone who lets live to flow without any planning, I think I'm doing OK. It could've been better. It could've been great.

All the tings I've gained, everything I've lost, I might've seemed so unmoved by them, but that's doesn't mean I really don't care about the pleasure and pain I am feeling.

Life is really like a roller-coaster ride. Once the train leaves, then there's nothing else you can do. Just wait out for the ride to over. You can scream, you can cover your eyes, have a heart-attack, whatever, I'll see you on the other side at the end of the ride.